Finding a Nice Man When You Cannot See

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Editor's Note: This is part of our ongoing series on Laughter is Often the Best Medicine, a series that encourages people who are blind or visually impaired to laugh at themselves and celebrate victories.

Being Single Again

maribel with dog guide Nev

Many, many moons ago, when I found myself back on the singles shelf, a divorced mother sharing a new home with my toddler and two emerging aliens (teenagers) and a food-challenged guide dog, life was so full it was hard to imagine ever needing to be part of a loving relationship ever again.

I stopped looking at the barometer of love which only seemed to forecast stormy new relationships. Where were all the nice men anyway? None on my radar…

So I got on with life – making friendships with wonderful women and being taken out on fun outings with my father and my young son. The aliens we left behind in the house, forever hopeful they would be tidying up their messes…

Every now and then, purely for my own entertainment, I would peer with a magnifying glass at the classifieds in the local paper to read, "Male seeking Female" section.

Some of the entries were hilarious, others shamefully honest – others boring and even some, interesting. Oh but I wouldn’t go as far as to answer one of these blatant adds…no, no…not me: that was not my style.

Taking the Big Step--Answering a Classified Ad

But on one occasion, before I really knew what I was doing – I answered an intriguing ad! Several pleasant phone conversations later, it was time to meet this new man. The relationship barometer was looking sunny for a change. I was nervous, how would I see if he looked as nice as he sounded?

table setting with roses

Photo by Harry Williamson/France11/Spring Studio

The Things We Do for Love

A friend of mine ran a cafe in the main street of my home town. As a single with visual impairment, this was the perfect place to meet my new male friend.

Sue and I talked about how she could be my eyes to judge any dodgy body language radiating from this unsuspecting male. The simple plan was to talk about the weather in his presence to steer me either closer towards him or further apart, depending on his "performance" in the café.

A Date Barometer Is Born

If she thought he looked like a nice guy, she would say, "Ah, the weather has been particularly lovely this week." But if he displayed odd body language, her steer clear message would be delivered with no uncertainty, "The weather is not that great today."

What did my friend’s barometer forecast on that day in the cafe as the guy took his seat: showers or sunshine? As Sue wiped down our table, she smiled at me "Not bad weather today, hey?"

I winked at her and we ordered lunch. By the end of our "date," I could tell by our conversation he was a nice man. Sunshine was a possibility but not a probability. In the end, I listened to my own female instincts and called it just another interesting day in the life of a visually impaired single Mom!


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Laughter is Often the Best Medicine

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