My Story: Interviews with people who are blind or have low vision

No two people experience vision loss in the same way. Many feel sadness, grief, anger, and other powerful emotions. Vision loss inevitably results in lifestyle changes and has an impact upon the lives of family and friends. Each person dealing with vision loss is unique; each has a compelling story to tell. (See our other My Story interviews)

My Story: Lachelle Smith

Visually impaired since birth, Lachelle Smith never thought of herself as a person with a disability when she was a child. Follow her journey through childhood, school, her early working life, marriage, and family, until she finally discovers the "life changing" career that was "meant to be ..."

A Small-Town Childhood 

"I grew up in a small rural town in Central Pennsylvania called Mount Union. I loved my childhood. It was filled with loving memories of family, friends, and faith. My hometown is so small that everyone knew who you were and to whom you belonged. Most neighbors also knew that I was the child who was born blind. Even though I was not born totally blind, most people in my town didn't understand the different levels and types of visual impairment, so they thought of me as blind. I am not totally blind - I consider myself visually impaired."

"Growing up in such a small town, with most people knowing that I had a visual impairment, you can imagine how many people were looking out for me all the time. I must say, though, most people didn't treat me any differently from my sighted sister. I was not raised to think about my disability as a problem. I was raised to embrace the many challenges God would allow into my life associated with my vision impairment. I viewed it as a blessing and not as a curse."

"In fact, I can remember one day when a mischievous friend was teasing me and made some hurtful comments about me not being able to see. I believe she actually used the word 'blind.' I can distinctly recall saying 'I'm not blind' and telling her I was offended that she would even say such a thing! When I discussed the incident later with my mother and grandmother, they told me that in fact I was legally blind, but that I should not let that label define who I was or who I would become." 

Sighted - Or Not?

"From that day until today, I have worked so hard not to be labeled or identified as disabled. One might say I've been 'passing for sighted' - and I would agree. However, in all honesty, I didn't know what 'passing' meant until I took a course in Psychosocial and Social Dynamics of Visual Impairment, which was a requirement of my Master's degree program in Vision Rehabilitation Therapy at Salus University. It was during that course that I was introduced to the concept of  'passing for sighted' and its implications. I can honestly say that 'passing' has helped me achieve many of the rewards of my life, but I can also say it has cost me emotionally."

"In my effort to be transparent, I say these truths about myself not only for the edification of a reader, but also for my own healing. You see, I wholeheartedly agree with my family and friends when they shared with me what the Bible says about suffering. My faith in Jesus Christ as Lord and Savior has helped me (and still does) to overcome my fears, anxieties, and disappointments associated with living with my visual disability. For I know that it is only through my belief in Jesus Christ, that I have been able to turn my troubles into triumphs. I feel so blessed to be who I am."

"Visually impaired or not, I consider myself 'whole.' In contemplating the concept of 'passing,' I know that it is real, but for many years prior to my knowledge of the term, I considered my actions 'coping' with my visual disability in the best way I could. I couldn't afford to look at myself as different just because I couldn't see that well. I wanted something better for myself that many well-meaning people didn't think was possible for a visually impaired person."

Early School and Education Challenges

"Another memorable challenge I faced growing up with a visual impairment was attending school. In order to provide me with the best education possible, my family relocated to Pittsburgh, PA, where I attended the Western Pennsylvania School for Blind Children for approximately two years. In that educational environment, I remember learning about colors, textures, and other types of sensory development experiences. When the vision professionals at my school determined that I could be mainstreamed into the public school system, my family returned to Mount Union, where I attended elementary school from grades K-9." 

"I can vividly recall the attitudes I sometimes faced from my teachers, some of whom believed that I would be better served in a 'special school' for the blind. Thank God for my mother, who insisted that I remain in public school! I'm not certain, but I may have been one of the first legally blind students in my school system. I remember feeling that some of my teachers were not happy that I was there. I am not speaking about all of my teachers, of course, because many were very supportive and didn't mind the interruption when I left the classroom to meet with my itinerant Teacher of the Visually Impaired (TVI) for one-to-one instruction in reading and test-taking strategies. There were some teachers, however, who were definitely not pleased. Nevertheless, I continued my quest to maintain as 'normal' a life as I could."

Relocation and More Challenges

"In the late 1980s, my family relocated to the Philadelphia area, where I was exposed to a very different living and learning environment. This was a drastic change for me socially. Remember, I came from a small town where I knew mostly everyone. Now, I was in the 'big city' and was petrified of my surroundings. I went from traveling freely in my hometown to always staying close to my new home - with the exception of attending school."

"Moving to Philadelphia changed me from an extravert to an introvert. I only went to school and the corner store independently; for all other trips outside my home, I would only travel with my mother, sister, or a trusted friend. (In fact, I'm embarrassed to admit that it wasn't until I began to work in the field of vision impairment that I began to travel independently in Philadelphia.) In any case, when my mother went to register me for school in Philadelphia, we were once again faced with proving that I was capable of attending a public school. I remember that the school wanted to place me in the Special Education class. Again, we fought that decision and I went on to complete my education in the public school system, graduating in the top 20% of my high school class at Overbrook High School, where I was in 'Motivation Honors,' a college preparatory program."

Moving On To College

"After high school, I continued to pursue higher education, attending Widener University in Chester, PA. I had the most pleasant experience at Widener. All of my professors were so supportive and were willing to make any accommodation necessary for me to succeed. I must tell you, however, that I never thought to request specific accommodations, with the exception of asking to be placed in a newer dormitory that would allow me to use my adaptive technology, which - at the time - was cumbersome and bulky. I used an old Telesensory Voyager closed circuit television (CCTV) with a 20" monitor, along with a table to keep everything in one place." 

"My only regret with my undergraduate college career is that I changed my original major from Psychology to Hotel and Restaurant Management. Why did I change? I don't know. I felt that I needed some excitement in my working life and career; what I found, however, were several unforeseen visual challenges during my school internships. Some of those challenges included having the ability to perform inventory tasks and monitor the performance of hundreds of employees who prepared meals. I was required to visually inspect all food preparation areas for cleanliness and make sure the employees were completing their assigned tasks."

"Many of my employees knew that I had a visual impairment and would exploit the fact that I could not monitor them in the same manner as my sighted colleagues did; therefore, some would not do the work and left me scrambling to complete it once they left. This caused great distress with my management, as well as in my home life. I would arrive at work two hours ahead of time and leave 1-2 hours past closing time to keep up with the amount of work I was required to complete. I often worked 12-hour days, from 9:00 AM to 9:00 PM, in order to keep up with everything."

"When I completed my first internship, I knew that my selection of career was not the right 'fit' and would be challenging for me, both visually and emotionally. I consider myself a 'people person,' but telling others what to do was just not 'me.' Nevertheless, I continued my studies in this field and graduated with my B.S. degree in Hotel/Restaurant Management." 

Meeting Her Future Husband - and Motherhood

"While at Widener University, I met and dated my husband, Willie A. Smith II. I was in my sophomore year and he was a junior when we began to date. This was a new experience for me, because I had never dated anyone prior to my husband. I didn't really know how to date and I was very self-conscious and wondered if anyone would want me or have a romantic interest in me if they knew that I was visually impaired."

"In fact, I tried to scare Will off by telling him in our very first telephone conversation that I was 'legally blind' and couldn't see well enough to go out with him. As you can imagine, it was actually me who was frightened. He was very persistent, however, and I finally decided to go out on a date with him. Almost 16 years later, we are still together."

"Will and I married two years after I graduated from Widener. We have two precious girls - Taylor Ann, age 12 and Lauren Victoria, age 9. I consider myself blessed to have a wonderful family who supports and encourages me to be the best I can be. None of them look at me as being visually impaired. Actually, they often forget and I need to remind them, in some instances, of my visual limitation. However, I try to instill in my children that with faith and determination, nothing is impossible, no matter what challenges come your way."

"As a visually impaired mother, I sometimes feel smothering. At times, my husband will have to tell me to back off and let the girls just play. For some time, I would want my husband to primarily interact with them outdoors, because I was afraid I would not be able to protect them or detect dangerous situations. I had to pray about it to the point where I have gotten a lot better. I now allow my girls to ride their bikes the entire length of the sidewalk versus only riding two home-lengths away. I think about how far I've come and am amazed that my girls are as outgoing as they are."

Work Experiences - and a Revelation

"Upon graduating from Widener University, I accepted my first job with a large food service corporation in the healthcare division as a Patient Services Manager/Vending Manager/Retail Manager. I cannot begin to express how difficult this job was for me. I struggled to make this job my career, but I never felt confident in my ability to do all that was needed to succeed. No matter how much I persevered, I was unhappy."

"I was charged with managing hundreds of employees in food preparation and retail operations (the cafeteria and gift shop), as well as supervising the vending machine operations. None of the forms I used were accessible and to be honest, I was afraid to ask for accommodations. Why? I was fearful that management would think that I wasn't capable of doing the work. I also didn't want to be viewed as a 'problem employee.' That is why I struggled to find my own solutions for many years."

"I left this job after my first daughter was born and took a job doing accounting work at a large hotel. Well, this was equally difficult. The duties of the job weren't complicated - it was the computer inventory system that I struggled to master. I was an accounts payable clerk, which required me to do a very visual job that was both boring and visually taxing. I didn't use assistive technology, so it took me hours to accomplish my work."

"I didn't use assistive technology because  ... well, I didn't ask for it. I think I was so sensitized to performing tasks 'the visual way' that I didn't take advantage of the tools that could have made the experience less painful. I guess this is where the 'passing' issue didn't work for me. Also, experience from past positions prepared me to seek my own solutions for job tasks I had difficulty performing."

"I had just finished creating a system in which I became more productive in my accounting job when a friend informed me that another large food service corporation was looking for a Patient Services Manager. I interviewed for the job, got it, and settled in to my now-familiar routine. This job required me to supervise food production, patient meal delivery, and overall compliance with hospital industry standards."

"Needless to say, I was very unhappy - again - with my job choice. I was forcing myself to continue in a career that did not make me happy and did not cultivate my strengths. Eighteen months into my position, the corporation lost the hospital account and we, the current management staff, could either relocate or accept unemployment. I chose to accept unemployment."

"At that same time, I realized I was pregnant with my second daughter and I took this opportunity to really examine what I wanted to do with my life. I knew that I no longer wanted to work in this field and I needed to concentrate on my family. I prayed and waited for direction from God and it hit me that I wanted to work in a field that would actually help someone. I knew I wanted to get my Master's degree and I decided to research counseling degrees. I absolutely love to encourage people. I believe that is my gift. I get pleasure helping someone recognize his or her strengths."

"I also recalled a conversation I once had with a co-worker at one of my past hospital jobs. She told me that I didn't belong in that field and that I should look into becoming a vision professional. When I recalled that conversation, I immediately contacted Salus University (which was the Pennsylvania College of Optometry at the time), where I first learned about the many professions and professionals associated with the vision rehabilitation field." 

Lachelle's story continues.