My family wants to help me, but they're doing too much!

If your vision loss is recent, your family and friends may be fearful when you try to do daily living tasks on your own, such as climbing stairs, preparing meals, or using household appliances. They may be overprotective or in “rescue” mode, regardless of the skills you’re still able to perform safely and independently. Encourage your family to discuss their concerns with you, and for them to hear your feelings and opinions as to what support you might need in the near future.

Helping Your Family and Friends Adjust to Your Vision Loss

Tell your family and friends how your vision loss currently makes you feel. In the early stages it would be understandable if you felt sadness, anger, vulnerability, or uncertainty. Talk with someone you trust, who knows you, and cares for you. It's important to share your feelings, and for others to share their feelings with you. You can then directly address your combined concerns.

For example, it might help both you and your family if you discussed those day-to-day activities that you believe you can manage on your own, or with minimal help, and which activities require assistance. In the beginning, you may have to keep reminding your family members and friends about your capabilities and lifetime of experience. Remember, too, that it may be difficult for them to "let go" without feeling hurt or rejected. But by sharing your understandable concerns, you may be able to create opportunities where, ideally, you can seek possible solutions -- together.

It also helps if you take the time to explain why you’re able to see better on some days than on others; for example, perhaps you see better on cloudy days because the glare from the sun can temporarily “blind” you and affect your ability to function.

If you have age-related macular degeneration (or AMD), it’s helpful to explain that while you can’t see faces because of problems with your central (or straight ahead) vision, you can still walk outdoors safely because your peripheral (or side) vision is still intact and useful. If you or your family have questions about AMD, you may find the Are You AWARE? newsletter's special issue devoted to AMD helpful.

Vision Loss Support Groups, Self-Study, and Vision Rehabilitation

You may find it helpful to share your feelings with a close family member or friend, a professional counselor, your family doctor, or a religious or spiritual leader. You can also reach out to a vision loss support group, explore vision rehabilitation self-study courses, or speak with a professional staff member at a vision rehabilitation agency.

Additional Information and Resources for Self-Help and Self-Study To Help Cope with Vision Loss

• How to cope with the emotional impact of blindness and low vision
• National organizations of and for people who are blind or have low vision
• Employment-related support groups
• State Rehabilitation Agencies and other vision services in your area
• Vision Rehabilitation Services
• Services Specific to Older Persons
• Searchable Databases

For more information about any of these options, see Find Services on this web site.