The range of emotions you are experiencing is normal. Some people have described their emotions toward vision loss as being similar to riding on a roller coaster. One day may be "okay" and you're motivated to work on overcoming your negative feelings. The next day, you're in the "dumps". You may think life will never be the same or have the same meaning as before. And may find it now more challenging to address your fears about your future ability to care for yourself independently. Curling up with the covers over your head appears to be a logical solution to your pain on these difficult days.

Simultaneously, family members are silently observing you. They too may be experiencing similar emotions, but no one's talking to each other about their feelings. Your vision loss may be likened to the "secret" elephant sitting in your living room. "If we don't acknowledge its existence, it may go away."

We know that vision loss doesn't usually "just go away" so discussions, whether they be individual or in a group, must occur. Share what you are feeling and how it's affecting your day-to-day living. Maybe you need to have support to motivate you to seek the help you need to cope with your vision loss. Listen to your family's concerns and the reasons they give as to why they may be acting differently toward you. Often the reaction will be, "We love you but it's been difficult to watch you go through this. We didn't know what to do or say. Maybe some of us avoided you because we felt so helpless and uncomfortable." Only when the "secret" is exposed and individuals feel comfortable sharing their feelings can the family be healed and united in helping you, and them, to overcome any fears and sadness they may have about your vision loss.

Since many factors impact on effective communication in families (whether they be cultural, past histories of relationships, family habits, or other issues) various organizations in your community may offer family support groups and services. (See Vision Rehabilitation Services in Your Area, State Rehabilitation Agencies, and Are there self-help or support groups for people who have vision impairments). It would be a good idea to consider reaching out to them.